Online Dating Apps Don’t Work For Most of Us. Here’s Why.
3 guaranteed ways to get traction on Bumble
How many times have you received a message in Bumble that said nothing but 'Hi' or 'Hey, how are you?' Frustrating, right?
If you try and get away with that lame effort of “Hey, how’s it going?” Bumble shuts that down pretty fast.
As soon as you start typing in “Hey” it pushes you to try a more “clever” opener. Those Bumble suggestions are pretty lame. Often overused.
The Shift Dating team of Dating Coaches suggest avoiding them. They simply don’t work. They’re not terribly clever and women see them as far too often.
What we’re seeing is that the most common response to those Bumble prompts is, swipe. And you’ll never see them again.
Some of the ridiculous one-liners include:
- “If you were a ghost who or what would you want to haunt?” and
- “Which TV family is most like yours?”,
Once you’re ready to make the first move, you’ve got to get it right. Especially if you want to stand out from the millions of other people using dating apps.
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Online dating can be frustrating and time consuming, with limited if any results. Or maybe you just don’t know where to start.
We’ve pulled together a few ideas that will get you the results, attention, and some serious traction on Bumble.
A GIF is the best.
This is always a winner. Whether you want to break the ice or you want to restart a stalled conversation.
A built-in feature for this app. And it works. We can’t deny the results. Some people might say, “oh, I’m not into GIFs,” but they have their own magic. Our team has seen first hand how often these get a smile and a response.
Can’t think of something to say? Or you need to send something that grabs her attention before that 24-hour window disappears? This is a great way to throw the ball back into the other court. We’re sure you’ll get her thinking twice before she passes you up.
Response rates can go up by +30% with a GIF. Our Dating Coaches use them –but we build on them as well. And we know what will get the highest response rate for our clients.
Guys, remember, she’s already got a hundred emails from guys who tell her: “she’s hot” and ask her to “go see a movie.” that’s dull. You need to be unique to stick out from the pack.
Here are a couple of simple starters:
- You seem pretty interesting, what trouble did you get into this weekend?
- What cool stuff did you do this weekend? Pyjama party? Brunch with friends? Netflix?
Questions like the two examples above work well. Mostly because they’re so much more engaging than replying with something lame like “Hey, how are you?” What’s next… “Fine, how about you?” Talk about instant-swipe.
Show her you can do the heavy lifting when it comes to chatting.
Thursday’s are essential!
That’s when you need to seize the opportunity to start building towards a weekend date. “Plans for the weekend?” is likely the other guy’s go-to line, so you need to do better than that.
Ask her a question like this:
- So, the weekend is on its way! How do you celebrate? With a martini? The chicken dance? [Think of something local that’s happening]???
- What does your Sunday look like? Cleaning, chilling or mimosa’s?
After exchanging a few messages about weekend plans, suggest meeting up for a coffee or a cocktail. We also recommend that you find something handy for both of you.
But before you do that, make sure you’re reading the signs correctly. If she’s not interested, you need to know what that looks like and move on.
Sometimes the conversation will stall.
The best way to spark it up again is with a witty yet thoughtful GIF. Or just be charming and bring a smile to her face.
The happier you make her feel, the higher the odds she’ll keep the message exchange going.
If humor comes a little more grudgingly, then telling a joke, making a comment, or some other witticism works every time. We’re all susceptible to funny, so use it to your advantage.
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Make an effort
Making someone think with the first message can be a pretty good indicator as to how the first date will go, so don’t be shy, be yourself!
Sometimes the easiest thing is to take a few seconds and take a look at those profile pictures. Take something from there and go.
According to Sam Owen, it matters that you “remember that you can only bond when you are authentic as otherwise, people can sense something feels off, and this hinders our ability to connect.”
Some thoughtful questions always get her thinking. Even if you’ve got to do a little research for the first few lines, do it.
It’s really important that you show your potential match that you can have an interesting conversation and that it doesn’t always need to be about you. Please stay away from those super cheesy lines. You’ll thank us later.
They’ve been done and overdone. You’re smarter than that!
Here are a few questions that we have found work. Give them a try.
What’s your favorite place in the entire world?
What’s something many people fear that doesn’t scare you at all?
What’s your favorite way to spend a weekend?
What do you hate most about dating?
What’s on your bucket list?
What is the most thoughtful gift you’ve ever received?
What’s your favorite thing about your job?
Some of these questions work better as you’ve started to establish some rapport with her. Pick the ones that you think she might find compelling. We have other great ideas for prompts in the post.
To meet the best women on Bumble, you need a strategy.
But that’s only if you’re ready to start meeting the type of women you want to date.
Join the growing list of happy clients who already have a head start.
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