Online Dating Apps Don’t Work For Most of Us. Here’s Why.
First virtual quarantine date? Check out these 6 tips
No matter how comfortable you’ve become with online dating, the new normal of social-distancing and quarantine driven self-isolation has thrown a curveball into even the most confident romantics’.
Plans for connection and intimacy. Whether you’ve just matched with someone new or it’s just not possible to quarantine with your significant other, virtual video quarantine dates could be a fun and creative way to grow and sustain a relationship, new, or not so new.
Check out these 6 gotta-do tips for a fun and flirty first virtual date that will go off without a hitch. Compliments of the Shift Dating team.
Free: Online dating success in 5 easy steps
Online dating can be frustrating and time consuming, with limited if any results. Or maybe you just don’t know where to start.
1. Test your tech
Nothing puts a damper on a video chat like a lousy WIFI connection or discovering that your camera or audio doesn’t work as soon as your crush’s face pops up on your screen.
Just like you would prepare for an online job interview, take a few minutes to run a test. Call a friend or roommate before your date and troubleshoot any unexpected glitches you might encounter.
Keep in mind that even the most reputable video chat services and popular online conferencing tools are frustratingly imperfect.
It’s probably best to find alternative solutions if your first app of choice isn’t working, such as moving your online virtual date from Zoom to Google Hangouts. Additionally, be sure to look and sound your best on camera by positioning your camera at eye level for a much more flattering angle and a more conversational look.
2. Short and sweet
Unless you’re an essential worker, chances are you have more availability in your calendar than ever before.
Although this can be an advantage when it comes to spending time online with someone, keep in mind that your date may very well be connecting over video chat for everything from work meetings to our favourite gym’s workouts.
Managing this new virtual reality can be tricky and emotionally draining during this time period where people may not be experiencing the same energy levels as before.
The key to success for every virtual date is to openly communicate with the other person to let them know how long they can expect the date to go for so they can plan their time accordingly, even if the next task on their daily to-do list is to just empty the dishwasher.
A simple script such as:
“Hey, are you free for a 20-minute happy hour after work on Wednesday? Drink before my online yoga class at 9 p.m? Could be fun!”
…would do the trick. Works for our team. And it will get their attention.
3. Dress it up
Make an effort and get ready for your close up. If you’re like most people in quarantine, chances are you’ve been spending more time in sweatpants than wearing a suit.
Use the virtual date as an excuse to break out of the monotony of oversized T-shirts and pyjama pants and prioritize getting ready just as you would on any other date.
- The act of dressing up and doing small acts of self-care like spraying on your favourite cologne of choice before logging on for your date will help boost your confidence, making it easier for your best self to shine through.
- Look your best on camera by opting for tops in solid bright colours in cool shades of blues, greens and purples that compliment your skin tone.
Our photography pros suggest avoiding busy patterns or wearing an all-black or an all-white top. These options tend to wash you out on camera.
4. Your attention please
It’s easy to get distracted when you’re on a virtual date in the comfort of your own home. However, just because you can’t meet at a bar or a restaurant like you normally would, it doesn’t mean you should skip out on giving that person your full respect and attention after they’ve taken the time out of their day to spend with you.
Don’t open another browser and go online shopping or pick up your phone to answer a quick text message. Make sure you’re in a quiet and private space when you sign on to your virtual date to avoid any awkward run-ins with roommates.
Once the convo starts rolling, be mindful of your body language.
Remember to smile, lean forward and nod your head when the other person is talking, just like you would on any other date.
5. We love surprises
Virtual dates can sometimes feel like they’re a job interview, but they don’t have to be!
- Lay on the compliments and crack a joke or two to break the awkwardness and make her laugh.
- Send over the funniest meme you saw on Instagram or that outrageous Tik Tok your group text can’t stop talking about.
- Bonus points if you take your virtual date to the next level. Think about having a bottle of wine or appetizers from a local restaurant delivered to their doorstep.
Remember to ask them if it’s ok if you can have their address to send over a surprise. This thoughtful gesture makes it easy to bond over a shared experience on your virtual quarantine date. We guarantee it’ll make your date feel pretty special.
One of our clients was thrilled at the results of her first virtual data after her Shift Dating coach suggested the find a meal to make virtually. “We made a simple pasta bolognese and we had so much fun! We’ve done a few now since that first virtual date. We’re really looking forward to our first meet-up”.
The team at Shift Dating suggests other fun ways to have fun with your sweetheart. Keep things light by playing a game of truth or dare or challenge your date to a Tik-Tok dance off.
We recommend this game of “most likely to…” questions that can really get the conversation going or The New York Time’s list of 36 questions you can ask if you want to fall in love. Or ask one of our Online Dating Coaches for suggestions that are specific to your needs.
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6. Find your inner charm
Is everyone tired about talking about the coronavirus all the time? We are.
The truth is social distancing and the difficulties of self-isolation have been a hard adjustment on everybody. Similar to most controversial topics, avoid digging too deep into the politics of the pandemic with someone you just met and do your best to focus on reassuring news and headlines.
Remember: positive thinking has a beneficial impact on everything you do, from your overall mental and physical health to your love life.
We suggest making a list of a few things you’ve been grateful for over the past few weeks, such as having the time to master the art of homemade bread or finally finishing the novels that have been collecting dust on your nightside table for months. That way when you’re calling your new crush on FaceTime, you’ll be in a better mood. You’ll be more focused on learning more about each other than chatting about the long lines at the local grocery store.
Preparation will help you find the silver lining about this inevitable topic of conversation and will bring positive energy into your conversation and relationship, making your date that much more excited for your next virtual meetup.
We’d love to know: have you been going on some virtual dates during your quarantine? Would you incorporate more virtual dating once things return back to normal?
Join the growing list of happy clients who already have a head start.
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